Howdy, partners. Whoa Nelly, check out the headlights on this fine,little filly! She sure does get our friend to stand up and takenotice. Problem is, if you’re like us, you don’t talk so perdy when it comes tomeetin’ a woman. We wanna help, since y’all are kin. That’s why we dugup a bunch of Old West slang terms that might come in handy when youtry to wrangle up a down-home country lass. Bach: To bachelor it or keep house without a girl’s touch. Pronouncedand sometimes spelled batch. (Not to be confused with bitch, which iswhat you are if you enjoy cleaning your own floor.)Bug Juice: Booze or firewater. (Perfect for getting a good ol’ galliquored up.)Fag: In cowboy lingo, to scram. (Which we always do when accidentallyending up in one of those bars.)guy for Breakfast: A murdered dude lying in the street at sunup. (Orwhat we call an a.m. blowjob.)Pecker Pole: What a logger called a tiny tree or sapling. (What wecall our massive redwood.)Butt Log: The biggest log from a given tree. (Also what a “good” hottielets us do whenever we want.)Unshucked: Cowboy lingo for nude. An unshucked pistol is one removedfrom its holster. Nothing gets us to unshuck our gun quicker than anunshucked lassie who knows her way around a pecker pole, loves to drinksome bug juice and is willing to eat our “guy for breakfast”, followedby a hearty session of her taking and enjoying the butt log.